The novel opens in the summer of 1989, following Cameron through her teenage years as she explores her sexuality in a small conservative town. There is not an incredible amount that happens in the novel, but the level of detail sucks you in with ease. Reading the book felt like living Cameron's life alongside her, and when you come to understand a character so intimately, it is impossible not to become invested in their story.
The atmosphere of this novel is incredibly strong, so much so that you can almost feel the Montana sun on your skin. The book's length only adds to that dragged-out feeling of endless summers, but in a way that is able to completely hold your attention.
"I felt all the ways in which this world seemed so, so enormous - the height of the trees, the hush and tick of the forest, the shift of the sunlight and shadows - but also so, so removed."
It's not just the intense atmosphere that is so captivating about this book, but the story itself as well. Danforth's exploration of the relationship between religion and sexuality is complex, and the conclusions made are largely left open to the reader. However, what remains unquestionable is the validity of Cameron's feelings, as well as the feelings of all the others forced to go through the same experience of conversion therapy.
"the whole fucking purpose of this place is to make us hate ourselves so that we change. We're supposed to hate who we are, despise it."
There are some truly crushing moments in this book, but also many that are both humorous and hopeful. Cameron's story isn't a tragedy, nor is it about a revolution. Instead, it just is, and the realness of her character and her friends is what makes this novel so powerful.
Thank you to Netgalley for providing me with this ebook in exchange for an honest review.
★★★★☆
YA Contemporary
Standalone
Lesbian protagonist
homophobia, transphobia, homophobic and transphobic slurs, attempted suicide, self-harm, conversion therapy
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