My 10 Goals for 2020 // aka to stop being so hard on myself

It might be a bit late for this post, and considering 2020 didn't start out in the best way for me I was really considering not writing this at all, but reading so many of my fellow bloggers goals made me feel inspired! After all, January 1st is just a date, and you can choose to start fresh whenever you want 🌱

Personal Goals

1. Don't get overwhelmed by work 😭 - I've started a new job and I've found it rewarding but very exhausting. I need to find a better work-life balance, but hopefully, that should come with time.

2. Don't apologise for no reason ❌ - I am notoriously bad at taking the blame for things where no one is to blame. It is difficult, but I am consciously trying to stop saying sorry all the time!

3. Focus on taking life a step at a time 🏃‍♀️ - I'm so obsessed with 5 years time. I want to be an author and an illustrator but I also want a job that pays and it feels like I'm two people pursuing different goals being pulled apart at the seams. I get kind of fixated on new unrealistic ideas all the time whenever I am faced with something I am not fully satisfied with (e.g. the other day I decided I was going to be a farmer. I live in the suburbs and know nothing about plants and could barely keep a goldfish alive. I cannot be a farmer. The time before that I decided to start an independent candle making company. I don't have the slightest idea of how candles are made). Life sometimes feels like it's coming at me very fast and that it's too short and I can't keep up, and I've realised it's really unhealthy to think like that. So one of my biggest goals for 2020 is just to think of the next step. Not 10 steps ahead. Just what comes next.

4. If I don't enjoy something anymore, just stop ⏸️ - I don't know why this is so difficult for me. It's really quite simple. I used to religiously bullet journal but after starting my job it became a chore. I get the same kind of satisfaction from drawing as I do from bullet journaling - so why was I so unhappy with myself for stopping? 2020 is the year where I'm going to acknowledge that if something doesn't spark joy, I'm allowed to let it go.

5. Accept that I don't like the whole social media thing, and that I can still have a future without it 📱 - I attended an event recently where someone said that while social media can help boost your career, it isn't essential to have one. And heck, why hadn't I realised that before? We live in a very digital age and whilst I love so many things about it (being able to have this blog, for example) I'm just not built for it. It gives me incredible anxiety and even though I'm an introvert, I find in-person interactions a lot easier. I guess I've just got to find a balance of social media that works for me, and to not be dependent on it to get my work out there. How I can find a way to do that though is a question for another day!

Creative Goals

6. Don't be afraid to promote my art 🎨 - Hey, I have an art Instagram and you should give it a follow! I'm actually a pretty decent artist and have a shop where I sell my work as well! No time to feel ashamed in 2020.

7. Try to draw something every week ✏️ - The emphasis on this one is the 'try'. I've already not really kept to this goal, because 2020 has been doing its thing. I was on such a roll at the end of 2019 so I'm hoping to pick it back up again, and also to be less precious with my work. I'm a major perfectionist so with my art this year I want to try to be messier and get faster. But for now, the base goal is to keep drawing. It makes me feel happy and carefree more than any of my other hobbies do, so I refuse to let it get sidetracked.

8. Blog when I feel like it 💻 - I tried so hard to keep a schedule in 2019 and I think my blog suffered for it. I don't have ideas like I used to, and I'm kind of learning to be okay with that. It's still going to be active and you can probably anticipate a scattering of posts, but my blog isn't my artistic priority for this year.

9. Read 40 books - and don't push to exceed that goal 📚 - This is a development from a goal I set last year, which was to spend less time on consuming art and more time creating it. Also, I've become so obsessed with the number of books I read per year that I've been missing out on those good old big fantasy novels. I figured that 40 is a healthy number that will keep me reading without putting too much pressure on myself.

10. Finish writing that gosh darn novel ✍️ - I've got to do it, okay. I've grown so much from studying creative writing at uni. I know I'm a darn good storyteller, and I no longer have the crippling self-doubt that I had with my writing three years ago. I think the problem is finding the time, but that is always the problem. I'm considering saving up some money, going completely off social media, and booking time off work to go on a friend's writers retreat for a week. No other responsibilities, no consequences. Just getting it done to prove that I can.

That was surprisingly therapeutic! Tell me, what are your goals for 2020? Are there any new creative endeavours you want to pursue? Any skills you want to develop? Maybe your focus for this year is on personal development? Let me know, I'd love to hear from you!